You got your green on? Are you ready party? Have you been working on your fake Irish accent and studying up on your Irish drinking songs? Have you picked your favorite Orange County Irish Bar? Maybe it’s the Harp Inn ^[1] or Skosh Monahan’s ^[2] in Costa Mesa, Gallagher’s Pub ^[3] or Muldoon’s Pub ^[4] in Newport Beach, Hennessey’s Tavern ^[5] in Dana Point and Laguna Beach, Silky Sullivan’s ^[6] in Fountain Valley, Fitzgerald’s ^[7] in Huntington Beach, Ohara’s in Orange, or the multitude of others I didn’t list, here are a few survival tips for those that don’t go out and “Party” on a regular basis. These come from years of experience, While it is true that I have not had a drink for many years, these tips come from personal experience.

• Designate a driver. The police know that your going to be drinking, and will be looking to keep you from driving under the influence. The cost of a cab is a lot less than that of a DUI.
• If your not Irish, don’t claim to be. It’s ok to celebrate St. Patricks day if you are not of Irish decent, but the Irish are very proud of there heritage and will call you out if you are claiming something your not.
• It would not be wise for you and your group to try and take over the local Irish Pub if you are not already regulars. The Irish are known to drink and fight.
• Getting drunk may be the excuse for why you do what you do, but does not waive the accountability.
• Dropping your drawers and exclaiming “You’ve found my little Leprechaun” may seem funny now, but usually ends bad.
• If you want to avoid the amateur drinkers, and are a regular at an Irish Pub, might I suggest the local Mexican food place?
• Everyone knows it’s St. Patricks Day tonight, so calling in sick to work tomorrow won’t fly.
• Going out “for a couple” with the people from work usually ends bad for one co-worker. If you have the propensity to make an ass of yourself while drinking, might I suggest you do it with people you don’t have spend every work day with.
• Green Beer equals Green Puke.

I hope these few tips will make your St. Patrick’s Day more pleasant.