It’s true I’m not much of a political pundit, but this is the season and I’m going out on a limb here. Please comment whichever side of the political fence you’re on, but I’m most diligently searching for those sitting smack on the fence…the notorious “swingvoters”.

With less than 2 weeks remaining, and my talking points for the undecideds burning a hole in my notebook…I’m still looking for you, if you’re willing to speak up, to dazzle with all these tidbits. But…where ARE you??? Everyone I know, who will open their mouths and/or ears to the discussion, is most definitely in one camp or the other! Where are you, oh desparadoes of the infamous fence??

Although it seems like we still assume O.C. is the bastion of conservatism, I have my doubts. I think I see more Kerry/Edwards bumper stickers than that other guy…more K/E signs in yards (do you think it’s true that radical democrat delinquents are stealing them in droves??) Maybe the Bushies are just waiting to strike at the ballotbox. Nevertheless, the enigmatic fence-sitters are hard to spot…something like grunion or snipe hunting, you may doubt they exist until you actually get one in your sights.

So, just in case you’re out there, oh elusive swingvoter, here is my list of talking points for you to consider:

Environment – even fiscal conservatives who care about the environment can’t possibly vote for Bush. He has systematically dismantled every possible advancement in environmental protection, and used laws from the 19th century to rape our U.S. Forests. In addition, the regs he can’t overturn, are conspicously unenforced allowing mining industry buddies to dump waste in waterways and buy mountain tops at bargain basement prices…good going, supporting business! Of course, business in O.C., especially the developers, have had their way with our environemnt for decades, so maybe we assume that every inch of land should be used to make money, and who needs tidepools with actually living specimens in them anyway? In that case, you know who to vote for.

Education – if you don’t think the government should fund the solutions it does agree to implement, then Bush is your man. He even cut $247 million from his wife’s favorite literacy program…I like a man who stands up for what he wants, but how many kids do we have who struggle with reading in O.C. because their parents don’t speak English as their first language. Would you folks like to see some help coming your way or just go it alone?

Medicare/Healthcare – good economics requires that you ensure the drug companies make lots of money, so they can reinvest in stimulating the economy, just like the rich who got all those rebate checks. Of course, we have drug companies here is O.C…but also bio-engineering companies who might support stem cell research. What do you guys think?

Government spending – I can’t understand this…what IS the difference between Dems and Republicans? Wasn’t it fiscal responsi-something…even with a war costing over $100 billion, the billions slide through his fingers like sand. I’m fascinated to know what O.C. business tycoons and post-bankruptcy council representatives think of this.

Social Security – young or old, don’t we keep wondering who’s going to mess up our entitlements next? If the young knew how to invest for the long haul (like 50 years out), they’d be fighting off the head hunters from Merrill-Lynch instead of working for $10/hour. I guess that goes for us destitute baby boomers as well! While they figure it out, if you don’t mind Bush borrowing from your retirement, so your kids will have to make up the difference…give the man another chance to fix it real good.

Homeland security & defeating the “axis of evil” – Ok, so how’re we doin’? Do more or less crazy people hate us than 4 years ago? Last year significant terrorist attacks stood at a 21-year high, according to the State Dept. Meanwhile, on the homefront chemical plants are not required to secure themselves against terrorists, but Uncle Sam has the right to check your library card for insidious literary choices…go figure!

Women’s rights…I gotta save something for a comeback, but are there any women out there who don’t care if they get to choose to have a child or not? If so, dive in and explain to us all.

Ok, I should have rattled some cages. O.C. is filled with diversity and we all live in our own social universe, missing out on the big picture, or the little fences, most of the time. Polls just confuse us, and I haven’t seen a poll of O.C. yet anyway, so I’m hoping we have some visitors who are willing to state their case for fence-sitting. Come out, come out, wherever you are!